My brother finally met with my parents today … at first, things got heated … my brother pinned a lot on my father, called him a drunk, would not call him “dad or father” (just referred to him as “him” or “he” …. this really pisses my father off to no end, though he has referred to my mother , my siblings, and I like that on occasion). My father walked out briefly, and then my brother left altogether. My mother coaxed him to return. They worked things out … even offered to let him move back in (not going to tell you the cringe that went through my backbone at that).
He basically admitted that he had (romantically) fallen out of love with my sister-in-law, and that they had been having problems for some time.
My interpretation is that my brother was shocked to learn that the nature of their relationship changed after being married, and changed even more when their first child came along. My brother has never had a good track record of communication, so these problems likely simmered for a long time, and then finally he felt that he was in a position where he wasn’t feeling the intimacy, and sought it out.
The irony (in my opinion) is that my brother was very quick and easy to lay the blame at my father’s feet when his family was forced to move out of my parent’s home, and was quick to continue blaming him today.
The one piece of news that was something of a positive development (this being the first time my brother and father had been together since my sister’s wedding in June. My brother has finally relented and allowed my father to see his kids, so sometime soon, my dad should be able to see his grandson for the first time. My parents have also allowed my brother the use of their home to meet with the kids when they visit with him.